I guess I am fortunate enough that after I got married I moved to another state. Lucky in the fact that I don’t really have the chance of running into my ex-boyfriends (though I did play against a guy I went on a date with right when we moved up here). What’s the big deal you ask? Well, nothing is worse than having a Slurpee craving when it is 110F outside in Phoenix and running to the 7-11. Now you are just running for a Slurpee so there is no need for make up, no real need for a bra (my mother would STRONGLY disagree with this statement), hair in a ponytail (and possibly a hat), and you are a sweaty mess because Phoenix is crappy hot. And though it may be hot, you do not look hot. And that of course is when you run into your ex-boyfriend, who is usually standing there with his new gorgeous girlfriend.
So I may have been able to get around looking bad for ex’s but I do a spectacular job of looking like crap for the neighbors, on a consistent basis I might add. We will take the other day for example. I was off to have lunch with some girlfriends and was dressed up rather cute (well, cute for me). Was there a neighbor in sight? No, clearly not. I even kind of lingered outside a bit just in case someone were to come out. No such luck. Upon returning from lunching I also lingered, but again, nothing.
I took a look around the house and decided it could use some cleaning. So up I went to change into my cleaning outfit. My cleaning outfit (if I am doing toilets and showers…which I was) consists of ratty green sweatpants that is pilling up and the threads are hanging barely hanging on. There is a bleach stain on the crotch (don’t ask because even I don’t know). My recycle t-shirt which looks like I recovered it from the paper shredder. And of course my nicely done hair gets thrown up into a ponytail and I usually have on a bandanna. And to make things even sexier (it’s really hard to fight of my husband sometimes ) is the fact that I have so many allergies I wear a surgical mask (doctors orders) while I clean.
I am cleaning away and the dog starts to do the potty dance. So out we go. Our dog hates going to the bathroom on the grass and tries to go on the patio so you have to go out there with her to make sure she doesn’t try and be sneaky (stand on grass but still pee on patio). Our house stands on taller ground than the most of our neighbors. So they can see you. I forget this sometimes. I walk out with the dog. And there is our neighborhood. All of them. I must have missed the memo about the gathering . I quickly ditched the mask but the rest of the ensemble was stellar all the same. I got to talking to my one neighbors and without thinking walked out the back gate to talk to her. She couldn’t help but stare at my bleach stain. I mean, I would stare if someone was wearing what I was. The good news is that I did not flash them at least (that is a story for another time).
It was pretty much how my week had been going. Along with my lose of motivation, it appears that I have also lost my luck. I’m bound and determined to find it. But since the week was less than adequate I needed some sugar to make it better. I had a lot of leftover blackberries so I decided to use them in a cupcake batter. Since I love blackberries and lime together I decided that the frosting should be key lime and cream cheese. Mmmm. These are awesome until  you bite into them. Because when purple food bakes up, it pretty much turns gray. And well, gray food is that appealing. So eat these with your eyes closed and you will be loving it.

Blackberry Cupcakes with Key Lime Cream Cheese Frosting

Blcakberry Cupcakes

1 ½ cups all-purpose flour
1 cup cake flour (you can use all-purpose if you need)
2/3 cup blackberry puree (with the seeds removed)
1 TBSP. baking powder
1 tsp  salt
½  cup unsalted butter, at room temperature
¼ cup vegetable oil
1 ½ cups granulated sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup whole milk
5 egg whites

Sift together flours, baking powder and salt in a medium bowl; set aside.
In a mixing bowl (if using a stand mixer use the paddle attachment), cream butter and sugar until light and fluffy, about 3 minutes.
Add vanilla extract and blackberry puree. Beat until incorporated.
In a liquid measuring cup, combing vegetable oil and milk.
Add flour mixture and milk/oil mixture alternatively to the mixing bowl. Beating on low speed after each addition.
Pour mixture into a large bowl. Scrape down to make sure you get all of the batter.
Clean out bowl and switch to whisk attachment.
Beat egg whites until stiff peaks form.
Fold 1/3 of the egg whites into the batter, to “lighten” the batter. Gently fold in the remaining egg whites.
Grease and lightly flour muffin pans. Fill each cup half full.
Bake at 375 degrees for 18 to 20 minutes or until done.
Cool on a wire rack.
Frost with Key Lime Cream Cheese Frosting.

Key Lime Cream Cheese Frosting

8 ounces cream cheese, at room temperature
3 TBSP unsalted butter, at room temperature
1/3 cup key lime juice
1 tsp vanilla extract
2-4 cups powdered sugar (depending on the consistency you are going for)

Beat together the cream cheese and butter, about 2 minutes. Add key lime juice and vanilla while mixer is on low until fully incorporated.
Add powdered sugar 1 cup at a time until you reach desired consistency.

I was always more of a play sports kind of girl than a go to the gym kind of girl. Gyms always intimidated me and so I avoided them.
But after sitting around on my butt too much in my early 20′s come age 24 I decided I would start going. To cut down on the intimidation factor I joined an all female gym. It was great. Still the greatest gym I ever belonged to because they literally had a class going every hour, either water aerobic or land. They had trainers in the gym that helped you, not just wiped down the equipment. And everyone was friendly. I miss that gym.
At the time I was teaching at the time most of my friends were females (elementary education is a predominately female occupation). So I worked all day with women and then I went and worked out with women. My dad feared for some odd reason that I would never meet a guy (I wasn’t really dating anyone at the time). So my dad has this idea for me to join a co-ed gym. He would pay the start up fee and then I would pay it monthly (it was only $12). I still worked out at the other gym as I was an employee (water aerobics instructor) and got gym use for free.
The first time I went there it was a whole other world. All the girls were in cute clothing. Wearing make up and earrings. Earrings to run on the treadmill? WTF? I soon learned that most of those ladies weren’t there to be working out. In fact, most people weren’t. It was like a giant meat market. Certainly my dad would be happy.
I thought for sure no one would be bothering me as I was not in cute clothes, unless an oversized sweatshirt that said Just Beer Me and sweatpants were cute. No make up and certainly no hoop earrings. And I was actually sweating on the treadmill. A lot. Kind of grossly a lot. But none the less that did not stop the creepy guys from making there move. Nor did they catch on when you turned up your headphones, making sure they saw it and continued to stare at the TV screen.
Now, not all the guys were creepy, just the ones picking up on me. And as much as the women dressed up the men pranced around like peacocks as well. I was not used to having eye candy in the gym. It was kind of distracting. So distracting, in fact, that I injured myself.
I was in the back row of the treadmills. In front of me were the bikes. We along comes a very attractive man, with one of the greatest butts I had every seen, wearing bike shorts. He gets on the bike and starts pedaling away. Since he was right there in my line of sight I couldn’t help but stare at his butt. Watching each butt cheek going up, down, up, down. It was all so mesmerizing.
So mesmerizing, that I was not paying attention and flew right off the treadmill. I chose the treadmill next to the wall and therefore slammed myself into the wall. It was not my finest moments (thank God You Tube did not exist back then).
From that point on I learned the valuable lesson of stare at the TV or your feet and not much else!
But all that exercising does make me extra hungry. Since my reader wanted angel food cake for a healthier option, I made it. Of course the same problem that arose with the Pavlovas happened with these. Leftover yolks. This time I made a Bavarian using my honey tangerines that were out at my store the other day. If you can’t get honey tangerines, regular tangerines or oranges are just fine.

Angel Food Cake and Honey Tangerine Bavarian Trifle

angel food cake
honey tangerine Bavarian
candied orange peels ( get the great recipe over on Use Real Butter)
honey tangerine caramel sauce

Angel Food Cake

1 ¾  cups superfine sugar
¼  tsp salt
1 cup cake flour, sifted
12 egg whites (the closer to room temperature the better)
1/3 cup warm water
1 tsp orange extract, or extract of your choice
1 ½  tsp cream of tartar
 
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Sift half of the sugar with the salt the cake flour, setting the remaining sugar aside.
Using a stand mixer using the whisk attachment add egg whites, water, orange extract, and cream of tarter. Whisk on low for two minutes.
Sift in the remaining sugar, beating continuously at medium speed. Once you have reached medium peaks, sift enough of the flour mixture to dust the top of the foam.
Gently fold in the flour mixture. Continue doing this until all of the flour mixture is incorporated.
Carefully spoon mixture into an ungreased tube pan. Bake for 35 minutes before checking for doneness with a wooden skewer. (When inserted halfway between the inner and outer wall, the skewer should come out dry).
Cool upside down on cooling rack for at least an hour before removing from pan.

Source: Food Network, Alton Brown

Honey Tangerine Bavarian
 
1 ¼ cups honey tangerine juice
zest of one tangerine
1 (¼ -ounces) envelope unflavored gelatin
8 large egg yolks
¼  cup sugar
1 TBSP fresh lemon juice
1 cup chilled heavy cream

Sprinkle gelatin over ¼  cup tangerine juice in a small bowl and let stand about 5 minutes.
Whisk together yolks, sugar, lemon juice, and remaining cup tangerine juice in a heavy medium saucepan, then cook over medium-low heat, whisking constantly, until mixture just comes to a simmer (do not let boil).
Remove from heat, then whisk in gelatin mixture until completely dissolved. Transfer to a metal bowl and chill in an ice bath, stirring frequently, until mixture has thickened to consistency of raw egg whites. Remove from ice bath.
Meanwhile, beat cream with zest until it just holds soft peaks.
Stir one third of whipped cream into yolk mixture to lighten, then fold in remaining cream gently but thoroughly.

Adapted from Epicurious.com
To assemble Trifle tear a few pieces of angel food cake and place at bottom of serving dish. Cover with 4 TBSP of Bavarian. Add a few more pieces of cake. Then top with 4 TBSP. Repeat this process until you have reached the top of the serving dish. Repeat until all of your serving dishes are filled (this makes about 6).
Cover with plastic wrap and place in refrigerator and chill for 4 hours. Top with caramel and orange peels.

If you would like to do a mold (like in the first photo), simply grease a mold. Pour the Bavarian in half way. Add a piece of angel food cake in the middle and press down. Cover with Bavarian until you reach the top. Cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate for 4 hours. Unmold and serve with caramel.

Honey Tangerine Caramel Sauce

1 ¼ cups honey tangerine juice
zest of 1 tangerine (using a vegetable peeler, it needs to be large enough to remove afterwords)
1 ½  cups sugar
¼  cup water
1 TBSP fresh lemon juice

Bring sugar, water, and zest to a boil in a small heavy saucepan over medium heat, stirring until sugar has dissolved, then wash down any sugar crystals from side of pan with a pastry brush dipped in cold water. Boil, without stirring, until sugar is deep amber. Remove from heat, then carefully add tangerine juice (mixture will bubble and steam vigorously) and simmer, stirring, until caramel has dissolved, 1 to 2 minutes. Stir in lemon juice and a pinch of salt, then remove from heat and cool. Chill, covered, until ready to serve (sauce will thicken slightly).

Source: Epicurious.com

Hey Peabody, can’t you ever make anything healthy? I get that a lot.
Yes, yes I can. Only problem is that this blog is not about healthy eating. I am the blog of indulgences. I had a couple people ask me to make angel food cake (that is coming up). Only problem is, sure angel food cake is low in fat because it only uses egg whites…12 egg whites. How is that a problem…well, I refuse to throw away 12 egg yolks. And with that the less than healthy part gets spurred on.
Let’s take today’s dessert, the Pavlova, for example. Named after a Russian ballerina who no doubt was watching her weight. Again, these are made with egg whites, some sugar and little else. But then, there I am again stuck with egg yolks. What’s a girl to do? Make curd, that’s what. Key lime curd to be exact.
These end up being a little bit like a key lime pie. You have the meringue, except of going on top, it goes on the bottom. You have the filling (which I like to add whipped cream to the curd to make it more creamy). Really all you are missing are the graham crackers. But the blackberries work just as nice. This is a light dessert…as in taste and texture (not calories). I don’t usually make these until around Easter time and usually through out the Spring but I figure I would throw out my version of a healthy dessert. I mean, if you did want to make the curd and just make the nests that could be healthy. Just please don’t write me how you threw fat free Cool Whip on them. Oye.
And as always, to help out those dieting, this is about 187 WW points per serving with curd. About 5 without.

Pavlova Nests with Key Lime Curd and Blackberries

Pavlova nests
Key lime curd
1 pint blackberries

Pavlova Nests

Pavlova recipe (see here)
piping bag
medium star tip

Prepare recipe up to the point of placing meringue on to baking sheet. Instead of mounds you are going to make nests. If you don’t want to make nests just follow the rest of the recipe.
Fit a piping bag with a medium-sized star tip (or you can use a plain tip) and pipe a tightly coiled spirals of meringue onto the prepared tray, trying as hard as you can to make sure they are the same level.
Pipe rings on the top edges of the rounds to form nests.
Bake as the recipe calls for. Nest take about the same amount of time as do the mounds.

Key Lime Curd

5 large egg yolks
¾  cups sugar
½ cup key lime juice
zest of 2 key limes
2 TBSP unsalted butter

Whisk the egg yolks, sugar, lemon juice, lime juice and zest in the top of a double boiler.
Add the butter to the egg yolk mixture and whisk until melted and smooth.
Cook about 40 minutes, stirring about every 15 minutes. The curd should be thick, resembling the consistency of loose custard.
Transfer the warm mixture to a bowl and cover it with plastic wrap, pressing the wrap onto the surface of the curd, sealing it and leaving no air between the wrap and the curd. Refrigerate the curd for at least 4 hours and up to 3 days.

Adapted from The Pastry Queen by Rebecca Rather

For a Key Lime Pie type flavor whip 1 cup heavy whipping cream with 3 TBSP granulated sugar. Fold this into the cooled curd. I prefer mine this way.

Assemble:

Take nest and place curd into the hole of the nest. Add berries and serve.

Now some may be wondering, what am I teaching the bunny to do? Nothing. I find it best not to train him (other than litter box train, which yes you can do) for everyone’s safety. See I am pretty sure that my bunny is the reincarnation of the Brain.
Now if you are wondering what I am talking about, I am in reference to Pinky and The Brain. It’s a cartoon that was out in the 90′s. It was original a short as part of another cartoon that became so popular they made it into it’s own show. It was about two lab mice. One is incredibly stupid, that would be Pinky. One is incredibly smart, that would be the Brain. Every night they would sneak out of their cage with one plan in mind….to take over the world.
I have come to realize that CCS is Pinky, lovable, happy, upbeat and generally doesn’t let much bother her.
LFB on the other hand is the Brain. I often see him plotting away in his cage. If he can ever figure out how to unlatch the cage…watch out. He already gets in and out of it when it is left open (it opens from the top). We used to do this all the time until we discovered that he was escaping…but would actually leap back into his cage if he heard you coming. Clearly, up to no good. Since I can’t be sure he’s not trying to take over the world or simply just get some beet tops from downstairs in the fridge, I find it best, in the interest of national security to not train him to do anything.
I, I on the other hand am trying to take over the world as well (quite unsuccessfully I might add). How? By slowly killing everyone off with fattening desserts. Alright, we know that is not true. We all know I am far too lazy to try and take over the world. But I still might be killing people with fattening desserts. This one is no exception.
Rice pudding hooked up with flan one day and what got created was this beautiful, straight to your hips Creamy Rice Pudding Cake. Oh my. If you are a rice pudding lover and you have never tried something like this  you must. It’s so comforting and yummy. The only problem I had is that even with the butter some of the caramel wanted to stay attached to the pan…but I forced it to work with me. I served it with a raspberry-lime coulis (yes, I realize I am on a raspberry sauce kick as of late) to cut through some of the richness of the dessert.

Approximately 279 WW points.

Creamy Lemon-Lime Rice Pudding Cake

2 cups half and half
2 cups heavy whipping cream
2/3 cup Arborio rice
½ cup packed brown sugar
4 strips lemon zest, removed with a vegetable peeler (you want them large enough to see so you can remove them later)
4 strips lime zest, removed with a vegetable peeler (you want them large enough to see so you can remove them later)
pinch of salt
3 large eggs, lightly beaten
1 tsp vanilla extract

1/3 cup granulated sugar
2 TBSP water

Bring cream, half and half, rice, brown sugar, zests, and salt to a simmer in a medium heavy saucepan over medium heat. Stir frequently. Reduce heat a cook to just a bare simmer, stirring occasionally for 15 minutes, or until most of the liquid is gone. Mine took almost 20. Remove from heat and let cool for 10 minutes. Once cooled, remove lemon and lime zests from the pudding mixture.
Whisk in eggs and vanilla. If you are not sure about how cool your pudding mixture is I would temper the eggs first.
Butter a 8 by 1 ½ inch round cake pan. Heat the granulated sugar and water in a small heavy bottomed saucepan over medium heat. Stir until the sugar has dissolved. Increase heat to high and bring mixture to a boil, washing down the sides of the pan with a wet pastry brush if you see any sugar crystals. Boil without stirring. Swirl the pan when you see color forming in order to get the caramel color to spread evenly. Cook until caramel is dark amber in color (you can go lighter if you like). Pour the caramel into the prepared pan. Let stand until cooled and hardened.
Pour rice mixture into the cake pan and smooth top with a rubber spatula. Bake at 350F for 35-40 minutes or until the top begins to brown but the center is still slightly jiggly. Let cool completely on a wire rack.
Run a knife around the edge of the pan. Invert cake onto a plate, tap the pan and carefully remove the pan. Serve in wedges.

Adapted from Luscious Creamy Desserts by Lori Longbotham

Raspberry-Lime Coulis

1 1/3 cup raspberries, fresh or frozen
juice of 1 small lime
3 TBSP powdered sugar

Combine raspberries and lime juice in a small saucepan. Cook over medium till the juice of the raspberries starts to come out. Add sugar. Cook until sugar is dissolved and berries are heated through.
Run berry mixture through a sieve. If you desire more sugar you can but remember this is going on a rich dessert so tart is good.