No, no….F you…


I had made these shortbread a couple of days ago in honour of Canada and the start of the Olympics. But things got busy and truthfully I could really think of anything but Go Canada to really write. Until today. When a lovely American citizen provided me with some fuel for my blog.

I was walking through the parking lot of Trader Joe’s today. Now if you are not familiar with Trader Joe’s, it’s a little more on the hippie side of things so I was a little taken back with what was said to me. I was wearing jeans, a Flames sweatshirt, and a Team Canada hat (pictured above ironically). When all of a sudden I hear some guy shout, “Fuck Canada and your hockey team, USA all the way!” He was pointing to my hat. I stood there thinking for a few seconds, deciding if I had enough time in my day to waste by engaging in conversation with this man. There were lots of witnesses so I thought, what the heck.

I smiled politely at the man. I said, “I take it you are a Team USA fan?” In which I got a “hell yeah I am”. So I followed up with “then who is your favorite player on the team?”

His reply? “Sidney Crosby”

My smile got even bigger. I told the guy that I hoped Sidney Crosby’s team would win the gold as well and left. I went on my merry little way picking up my brown rice sushi, almond milk, and Black Toad beer (seriously good stuff)

Now if you are confused as to why I find this funny, then you don’t know hockey. If you do know who Sidney Crosby is, then you probably are already laughing at this point in the story. See non-hockey following folks or those who live in non-hockey caves, Sidney Crosby plays for…wait for it….Team Canada.

I have several people ask me why I don’t bake that much with maple syrup. Very simple answer. I eat it. These cookies are case in point. They were like little mini, melt in your mouth, maple goodness. I swear I ate 10 (more like 30 shhhhh) in the blink of an eye. I tried to freeze them to stop me from eating them. Only to learn, I like them even better when they are frozen (just like I do with Thin Mints). So I quickly pushed them off on as many people as I could think of. :)

They do make a nice snack while you watch that fine American, Sidney Crosby, oh wait….., play ice hockey.


Go Team Canada Maple-Pecan Shortbread Rounds

2 ¼ cups all-purpose flour, plus more for work surface
½ cup cake flour (not self-rising)
½ tsp salt
½ cup pecan halves (about 2 ¼ ounces), finely chopped
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, at room temperature
½ cup granulated sugar
½ cup light brown sugar, loosely packed
¼ cup pure maple syrup, preferably grade B
1 large egg yolk
¼ tsp pure maple extract

1 large egg, lightly beaten
about 30 pecan halves to top cookies with (optional)

In a medium bowl, sift flours and salt. Whisk in chopped pecans, set aside.

In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, cream butter, brown sugar, and granulated sugar on medium-high speed until smooth and light, about two minutes.

Add the maple syrup, egg yolk, and extract; beat on medium speed until well combined.

On low speed, gradually add flour mixture, beating until just combined.

Dough should be smooth and pliable. Flatten into a disk. Wrap in plastic; chill until firm, 1 ½ hours or overnight.

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line baking sheet with parchment paper.

On a lightly floured work surface, roll out dough to ¼ inch thick. Cut out rounds using a two-inch cookie cutter; place one inch apart on prepared baking sheet. Brush tops with beaten egg;  place a pecan half in the middle.

Bake cookies, rotating baking sheet halfway through, until golden around the edges, 10 to 12 minutes. Transfer to a wire rack to cool. Store in airtight containers at room temperature up to four days.

Adapted from Martha Stewart Cookies by Martha Stewart

Comments

  1. OMG that’s funny that he named a Canadian player!

  2. It’s funny how the Olympics is supposed to embody global harmony, not nationalism.

    I love Sydney Crosby, which means often find myself hoping the Penguins will win, despite the fact that I’ve never been to Pittsburg, and this pits me against my local teams.

    By rooting for the team with the hottest hockey player at all times, I find myself free of hate, and rooting for many diverse cities and countries, eh?

  3. omg i am laughing my ass off!!! what a great story :)

    and the cookie sounds amazing, too!!!

  4. So, I did NOT know who Sidney Crosby was but I figured it out by your reaction! That is hilarious. These cookies look wonderful.

  5. It is sad that so few of us Americans appreciate hockey. It is even worse when you live in a Southern state. These cookies look amazing. I usually don’t keep maple syrup in the house because it is dangerous to my bottom but I plan on getting some this weekend so I can make these cookies.

  6. Okay, you know what’s funny … on my way home tonight I’m sitting on the subway, nervous, because I don’t want to miss the start of the game and I think, “Man, I haven’t visited Peabody in awhile! I wonder if she’s watching the Olympics?”

    This post is CLASSIC! How I wish I could have been there. And yes, let’s hope Sydney Crosby’s team finds the strength and will to claim glory!

    I bet if you sent them some of these cookies they’d be awful happy!!!

    GO CANADA!!!

  7. Oh my gosh! So priceless =D. I laughed so hard at that! Go Canada!

    Great cookies as well – I made a dessert to cheer on our athletes also =D.

  8. Ha! Sounds like he got what he deserves….. Sort of a surprising encounter, I always find Trader Joe’s to be a place full of great people!

  9. Sweet shoot out there, Mr. Crosby. Go Canada!

  10. He really picked the wrong women to mouth off to. You out smarted him and made him look very stupid without him even realizing it!
    I just love non violent confrontations. Brains versus testosterone!

    Hey, how bout those cookies? I betcha I could eat 10 of those too!

  11. Judy Krist says:

    The overtime goal by Sidney must have been extra SWEET for you…I am a Canadian…go Canada go!!!!!!

  12. I’m going to stay out of the hockey discussion and just say… pass the cookies! :)

  13. Above and beyond that guy being stupid…he has no freakin’ sportsmanship! Good grief. Your cookies sound delicious. My guys would definitely like these!

  14. Congrats on the win yesterday! Not that I know anything about hockey, but I was watching the Olympics and heard the announcement!

  15. I love anything maple! That is why I always make chocolate desserts (for the most part) so I don’t eat them. You are a better person than I – I would have called him out right there, took a photo with my cell phone and told him to google culinary concoctions peabody. But then again – who could help him spell all those big words?

  16. Haha what a great story. People are morons. This is why their is a rule to think before you speak. Being a hockey fan I laughed immediately….how could I not :)

    These cookies look great too. I made something similar not to long ago. Delicious :)

  17. Good Lord! That guy is a moron! I knew you would have something great to share about the Olympics! And I am definitely making these cookies tonight.

  18. I have been cheering for everyone, paying no attention to which country they are from. Now it looks like I MUST cheer for team Canada just for principle’s sake. Thanks for the laugh.

  19. Yeah, as a hockey fan, I was laughing. Can’t exactly root against FOUR Sharks now can I :) I’m just hoping at least one team with a Shark on it wins gold.

  20. LOL. Oh, ignorant Americans. Wait, I live in America- but I’m Asian and therefore not TRULY American. Hmm perhaps I’m in denial.

    Anyways, those shortbread cookies look amazing. I looooove shortbread. -drool- And shortbread with maple syrup and pecans? WHAT? AMAZING! I must make these someday. Thanks for sharing. :D Btw yay Team Canada! (I don’t care that much about sports although I do marvel at every thing in the Olympics)

  21. Oh wow, so embarassing that my fellow American can sometimes be so ignorant and what an a**! Americans and Canadians have always been friendly neighbors. What’s his deal! But, at least you got the last laugh on that one :) yummy looking cookies also!

  22. ohhh big game today! Canada vs USA I don’t even watch hockey but there’s something about olympic hockey that makes me NEED to watch it! Go Team Canada!!!

  23. Oh wow, you’re much nicer than me. I would have just rolled my eyes and pretended he didn’t exist.
    The cap reminds me of a hockey jersey I gave my best friend. Sigh, memories. Maybe I’ll shed a tear or two as I make these very Canadian cookies, hee hee :)

  24. Ha that story made my day. Looking forward to the game later!

  25. Ooh wow boy do these look good :) I love the little pecan on top hehe.

  26. Not such a great night for Team Canada, eh?

    Seriously, that dude was so unclassy and so ignorant. Combine such citizens with Barack Obama’s performance as the-President-who-wants-to-weaken-America, and I have to admit, for the first time in my life, I am not PROUD of the USA.

    Go Conservative and love your fellow man/woman from all nations.

  27. Debbie in WA says:

    I am a proud American and love Canadians! Politics aside (please) the guy was a jerk and you handled him perfectly Peabody!

  28. Hahaha how I would love to see his face once he realises!

  29. don’t you just love ignorant Americans?! haha. love your story, even if I am not a hockey watcher :)

  30. I do not follow hockey, but that story game me a good chuckle…what a jackass! Your cookies look gorgeous!

  31. Awesome response to ignorance! And beautiful cookies. :)

  32. Wow, my husband and I got a kick out of that story…what an idiot!

  33. Funny!
    Oh, man do I love maple syrup. With all the snow out there today I may just have to make these as a treat!

  34. Pea this is why I love you a latte too! A story like this is like the sun rising! or it it the sun setting on this guy’s IQ.
    All your writing just seems to get better and better!

  35. ROTFLMAO. I think I died laughing and of course, shared your blog with a few others.

    Thanks for cheering for Team Canada. We are facing off with Team USA. I hope your “Trader Joe” friend will still cheer for Sidney Crosby. haha Does he like Joe Thorton as well? haha

    You must be delighted that Jerome is playing lots. WOOOOO

    If you get this message in time, I recommend that you make a trip up to Vancouver. It’s electric up here; absolutely lively and vibrant! Go Crosby!

  36. Peabody!!!

    I hope your friend is still cheering for Sidney Crosby. :o )

    WOOOO from your fan in Vancouver! :D

  37. Hey, your parking lot guy was right! Sidney Crosby for the WIN!

  38. I don’t even know you but you’re the 1st person I thought of when Sid scored last night!

  39. Stephanie says:

    Canadian, American, Italian, French etc, who cares? Dumb is still dumb no matter the nationality, no?

    I’m a team USA hockey fan but was really excited for our friendly neighbors to the North to win it all! :)

  40. ppocket says:

    Great story! As a Vancouverite living in Seattle, I recieved some similar comments in reponse to my Team Canada gear on… Glad the winning goal came from Sidney :)

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  1. [...] won in overtime. On a goal by none other than….Sidney Crosby. Why yes boys and girls, in the ultimate Karma revenge, the very favorite player of Mr. Parking Lot F-bomb Dropper scored in overtime.  Against the very [...]

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