Barely there underwear…


Dear Victoria Secret,
First off, thank you so much for caring and taking the time to write me every day (sometimes twice a day) it really does mean a lot to me that you care so much about me and my undergarment choices. That being said, you clearly have not seen a photo of me as of late. Because if you did you would know that the pink dental floss you are calling underwear would look insanely horrid on me. For I am on 120mg of Prednisone a day which is not kind to the body. And even before that I was not what one might call model shape. :)

Let me let you in on a little secret of my own Victoria…I eat food. I know your models have learned to live on Sugar Free Red Bull, cigarettes, coke, and air, but that bandwagon is not for me. And therefore sending me photos day in and day out of barely clothed women isn’t going to inspire me to run and buy your clothing. And though it should probably inspire me to not eat for the next six months that isn’t going to happen either as I know their bodies are ridiculous and non-attainable to most women (without extreme measures). Super models never seem happy anyway. Well, when they are photographed high or drunk sure. And they suck in bed, or at least that’s what this study says.

So kindly remove me from your mailing list. I keep asking. I moved you to spam but still have to clear that out. And there you are next to the Sur La Table spam, which I don’t mind but my pocket book does.

Yours truly,
Peabody

Another reason my body will never be in shape for barely there wear….this pie. Though you would think this pie would be super sweet or rich, it surprisingly isn’t…well at least to me. Yes, it’s a little ghetto. My oh so nice best friend was more than happy to comment “aren’t you a pastry chef?” which I replied that I was NOT and to shut up and just try it. Which he did. And ate the piece quickly. Followed by a much larger piece and my point was proven. :P

You will want to use the mini ones on this. If you use the big ones you will have more fondant flavor than chocolate. Which you may want. But if you don’t then I would maybe add more milk chocolate if you can only find the large ones.

If you missed the post earlier today you should know that I’m spending my summer trying to grow a farm on my patio…should be fun and probably full of mishaps. :) You can of course follow my progress on this blog but also know I am in competition with two other bloggers for best farm. Did I mention they live in farm country…and I live in the land of no sun…oh and we are supposed to get snow on Thursday. Sigh. :P Just in time for planting. Oh and to the person who asked, yes the girl in the photo with the tomato is me. And yes, my parents were cleraly horrible parents as I am allergic to raw tomatoes. :P

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Comments

  1. MMMMM that pie looks amazing! and you are going to do great in that challenge Peabody!! Can’t wait to follow the progress!

  2. Oh my word……We were just discussing earlier today on facebook which is our favorite easter egg and for me it has always been a Cadburys Creme Egg :) This is awesomeness. Thank you for sharing….xx

  3. VS has the bitchest saleswomen EVER. Ever. I buy my underwear at Marshall’s. I got 4 pairs of Calvin Klein briefs for $4.99!

    If you form vegetables plants and flowers out of snow, does that count as a harvest?

  4. A great post!

    Oh my goodness, that pie is just incredibly tempting!

    Cheers,

    Rosa

  5. I will never understand how showing us pictures of 15 year olds who have probably never eaten a hamburger is supposed to sell underwear.
    But I do understand your love for this pie. Mmm.

  6. oh this made me laugh. I can so relate…but they send me 500 catalogs a week in my opinion just to remind me that I don’t look like that. Maybe they could charge less for their stuff if they didn’t print so many catlogs. Thanks for the chuckle.

  7. I am constantly annoyed with every chain store that emails me on a daily basis…Victoria’s, Barnes and Noble, Borders, Best Buy….seriously. Every day. It does NOT make me want to go there and shop. Even if they ARE having a sale!

    The day after Easter I shall find myself at CVS buying ever last bag of Cadbury eggs (on sale!) so that I can make this. Score.

  8. i read on another blog awhile ago, that lane bryant has underware for normal sized women that is cut to cover your butt the way vs underware used to be cut. random info, but it pops in my head when waif thin models and vs are mentioned.
    semper ubi sub ubi is a little latin humor that pops in my head whenever underware is mentioned :)

  9. Just today I got an email from Victoria and I thought to myself, “I am going to unsubscribe once and for all!”, but alas, I could find no unsubscribe link. So I guess I’m back in the same boat as you, marking it all as spam.
    By the way, the nosh is mouthwatering, as always.

  10. This pie looks dangerously good! And I have always wanted to have a garden but it always seems like to much work. Maybe you will be the inspiration I need!

  11. Super models never look happy because they are always hungry! Now, if they had a piece of this then pie then they would definitely have a genuine smile on their face again.

  12. I’d say: smother them! Preferrably in this pie. Which would be a waste anyway, a sinful waist if there ever was one.

    Lane Bryant huh? I’ll keep my eye out for them when I’m in the States this summer. Butt-covering underwear where art thou…

  13. omg I want to dive into this pie. Victoria’s secret catalog be damned! Love it!

  14. finished10dnails says:

    Peabody,

    We need more of you in this world – not just for the recipes (which are fantabulous) but for the commentary.

  15. For the most part, I don’t really find models attractive, but still, I’ll trade spam with you? You send me the underwear spam, I’ll send you the ones telling me I’m impotent and need “enhancements” :) .
    And this pie looks awesome :) . I have never been a fan of cream eggs but I love the idea getting the flavour without it being super sweet.

  16. This looks just awesome! I am in love again!

    :)

    Love your blog…

  17. This post cracked me up! Looking like a supermodel is overrated. This pie, not so much.

  18. I’d be more than happy to forgo shopping at Victoria Secrets to eat lots and lots of this pie!

  19. What an inventive way to use cadburry eggs!

  20. Are you kidding me? Why aren’t you my neighbor?

  21. @Jessica- because you and I would make each other so big we would need a crane or two to move us…but I might be okay with that. :)

  22. victoria’s secret – get real.

    great link – confirms things i have been thinking about for years. how did you happen to come upon it?

  23. Screw Victoria and her Secrets..I have none and my body, which is soft and squishy like a girls should be, is proof! :-)

  24. I love you…..just sayin’ LOL

  25. Yeah, that pie is kinda ghetto. But in an oh-so-delicious sort of way. Nobody rocks a Cadbury Creme Egg like you, Pea!

  26. The Blog post is hysterical. The pie? No, no, no thank you. I can’t stand Cadbury Cream Eggs, nor can I stand the taste of milk chocolate, but, it does look really good!
    If it was plain DARK chocolate? NOW we’re talking.

    Plus, I had to comment that I too am allergic to raw tomatoes. If I get so much as a seed it blisters the inside of my mouth… and etc. Yeah. People don’t believe me, but, it’s actually a fairly common allergy, according to my doctor. Voilà.

    Kind regards, Kitty

  27. I looked at this and couldnt believe it. Could anymore sugar be packed into one dish. No wonder late onset diabetes is so prevalent in the states. Im diabetic and just looking at that had me searching for the insulin

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