The problem could be you…

So Crazy Cocker Spaniel has separation anxiety and abandonment issues. I wish I was never told that at the shelter where I volunteered at and got her from because I found out years later that I made it worse. Cesar Millan is the dog whisperer…sounds silly but the guy really is good. I was watching his show one day and it was on separation anxiety and it hit me. The issue wasn’t with the dog…it was with me. I made a big deal about leaving her and a big deal when I came back. She was reacting to that. My reaction is what was making it worse.

At the gym this weekend his show was on and I got sucked into watching about this woman and her dog that would freak out on other dogs. Turns out the woman’s own fear was being projected onto the dog and once they worked that out with her the dog started to do fine with other animals. She talked about how she always thought of worst case scenario and Cesar told her that she was the “prisoner of your own creativity”. I liked that. I think that is true for a lot of people. You make things worse than what they are. Or you project your own feelings on to others.

Anyway part of the dog’s treatment was that the owner went to therapy. I think if you have an issue it’s up to you to be responsible and help make the issue better. When I knew that MDP’s kids would be coming and living with us I switched from my one counselor to one that specialized in blended families, for I had always been around kids being a teacher, but this was a whole different ball game. I wanted to do what was best to make the transition the easiest. MDP also joins in from time to time when he can so when issues arise we can work on them together. I like to think that in doing that the transition for his teens has gone pretty well.

I could have built up in my head all the ways that things could have gone wrong…or been the prisoner of my own creativity but instead I brainstormed all the positives that I could get out of the change. So many people just prepare for the worst or react so poorly that they cause anxiety and sadness in others…people or pets. Some people sadly can’t see that they are indeed the problem. I never thought I was the problem with the dog…but I was. I owned up to that. I wish more people would own up to their own reactions.

One reaction I did get was holy cow these are good…I mean these suck don’t anyone eat any of these. That’s what our goalie said. It was his birthday the day before and I decided that since he is one of the guys that number one loves food, and number two contributes money to snack fund, that I would step up and make something extra yummy for him. Normally we have a few snacks left, this week we did not. Well we had a few left only because our goalie took them home and probably would have wrestled people for them. Since St. Patty’s Day will be coming up sort of soon I have had Bailey’s on the mind. That and our goalie loves to add Bailey’s to his milkshakes when we go to Denny’s…yes you can get booze at some Denny’s!

In someways these remind me of the holidays. My mom always was drinking Bailey’s around holiday time (shhhh don’t tell her I snitched on her) in her coffee or cocoa. As an adult now I see the appeal. :) This are a yummy chocolate sugar cookie (I use this to make “gingerbread” men sometimes as an alternative). Filled with a yummy Bailey’s Irish Cream Buttercream and homemade Whiskey Caramel. All three are good separate but together they are fantastic.

Chocolate Sandwich Cookies with Bailey’s Irish Cream Buttercream and Whiskey Caramel

Chocolate Sugar Cookie
1 1/4 cup granulated sugar
1 cup unsalted butter, at room temperature
1 egg
1 tsp. vanilla extract (I used Rodelle)
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup cocoa powder (I used Rodelle)
Pinch of salt

In a stand mixer using the paddle attachment cream together the butter and sugar on medium speed until light and fluffy, about 3 minutes.

Turn mixer to low, and add in egg and vanilla. Mix until just incorporated.

With mixer still on low, add in flour a cup at a time. Then add in cocoa powder and then sprinkle with pinch of salt. Mix until cocoa is incorporated, then turn off mixer.

The dough will appear to be a bit sticky.
Transfer dough to a piece a parchment paper. Place another piece of parchment paper on top and roll out dough to desired thickness. Keep in mind that these are going to be sandwich cookies so try not to make them too thick. Mine were thick because my hand sucks and rolling cookies out and my hand do not mix.

Place dough (still sandwiched in parchment) in refrigerator for about an hour, or freezer for 15 minutes, until dough is firm.

When ready to bake, turn oven to 350. Remove dough and then remove one side of parchment. Using your chosen cookie cutter shape (I went round), cut out cookies and place on prepared cookie sheet.
After you have cut out all your cookies, roll dough scraps back together and roll out again.
Bake cookies for 8-11 minutes. Allow to cool to room temperature.
Cookie recipe slightly adapted from I am Baker

Bailey’s Irish Cream Buttercream Frosting
½ cup unsalted butter
¼ cup shortening
3-4 cups powdered sugar
¼ cup Bailey’s Irish Cream (may need more if you want thinner frosting)

Using a stand mixer with paddle attachment beat the butter and shortening with 1 cup of powdered sugar.

Once fully incorporated add the Bailey’s. Add powdered sugar a cup at a time until reached desired consistency. If too thin add more Bailey’s. If too thick add more powdered sugar.

I used THIS recipe for the Whiskey Caramels except no salt and mine didn’t get nearly that dark.

To make the cookies pipe some buttercream onto one cookie and a spoonful of caramel on the other cookie and sandwich them together. You will have extra caramel…suffer. :P

Pin It


  1. Those look amazing! What irresistible cookies.



  2. Those cookies look INSANE…totally awesome flavors. :)

  3. I don’t like Cesar Milan. I think he is a dog abuser. One video showing him choking a dog as “training” until it pees itself and the floppiness also seemed to indicate unconsciousness or at least not totally awake anymore… that’s it for me. Sure, he might have a few tips that make sense, but other dog trainers have the same tips and don’t abuse dogs.

    But… many times our dogs issues are being caused or made worse by the owners. My dog needs a lot of work, he barks aggressively at other dogs while lunging when we are on walks, but when I realized that I was (and my boyfriend also) making it worse, I changed what I did when he freaked out, and he now is somewhat calmer on walks. There are even times when we actually have a walk where he doesn’t bark and lunge once! He usually hops on two feet and is very alert when we pass by some of his bark buddies though, but sometimes, no barking and lunging. Much better than constant barking and lunging at every fence.

  4. calmassertive says:

    To Diane:

    If I were to show you a quick clip of someone shoving a small child to the ground and then the child crying, you might (as you did above) decry that as ‘abuse’. But if I were to tell you that in context, the child was in the path of an oncoming car and the shove was at the last second to just in time move the child out of danger, you would instead applaud the action as having saved the child’s life. Context is everything. The ‘video’ you saw was exactly this scenario, taken out of context on purpose to distort the big picture of what was really happening.

    If I were to guess the out-of-context clip was of Shadow, a dog that had bitten its owners repeatedly and that had attempted to attack other dogs countless times. The COMPLETE episode shows all this very clearly. Millan arrives and wants to see the problem first hand so he takes the dog for a walk alongside its ‘worst enemy’. The dog acts up and he tries to distract it with a touch from his foot, and the dog redirects the attack to HIM. As the dog tries repeatedly to get at him he just pulls up on the leash to keep the dog from getting him, and when the dog finally tires he puts it on the ground to get it to Completely calm down. As seen on the Full episode the process results in a calm dog that resumes the walk without all the hostility that was previously shown. The dog was not Abused, it was Dominated. After the exercise it showed no Fear of the person who dominated him, because he understood what the exercise was about. The Full episode shows lots more of the dog’s owner learning to not let the dog dominate Her and thus gain the respect and trust she previously did not have. This is a dog that all the cookie-and-clicker folks hypcritically recommend be euthanized for its aggression, but the Full episode is designed to teach the viewer the difference between True aggression, which this dog did Not possess, and Dominance, which this dog possessed in spades. The person who excerpted the clip from the Full episode clearly did not learn the episode’s lesson, one which the appreciated owners Did learn, and one which possibly You could learn if you watch the Full episode. Remember, watching someone knocking down a child in the street isn’t always what someone with an edited video makes it appear.

  5. I need a dozen on these…extra Irish Cream Buttercream on the side :)

  6. I agree with Diane, Milan is a charlatan and an abuser. The ‘dominance’ methodology of training is outdated and plain old wrong as it’s based on old and improperly done research on randomly thrown together wolf ‘packs’ in captivity, not real ones in the wild. Debbie Jacobs of has a bunch of evidence against him and his methods and a whole lot of other, good info for you and your anxious doggy. I also suggest you read <— that article as it has multitudes of other points against the thinly veiled animal abuse that is the 'dominance method' of training.
    ANYWAY. These cookies are fantastic, I've used the original recipe from I am Baker before and they turned out beautifully! It's also almost impossible to go wrong with Bailey's… can't wait to try the frosting!

  7. Oh wow! These look so awesome. All that caramel oozing out. Yum.

  8. I needed this reminder today. I am horrible about building things up in my headed and projecting that.

    I also need to make these. Nothing makes me happier than baileys and chocolate.

  9. Two words. Food. Porn.

    So glad you found out how to help CCS! I think I’ve only seen Cesar once, but I really like Victoria Stilwell. Many people don’t understand how to speak dog. Dogs are not humans, and treating them like people screws them up.

  10. Those cookies look awesome! Wish I had a bowl of just the filling to snack on right now :)

  11. The photos on this are TDF. Seriously awesome, Pea.

  12. Where’s the recipe for the whiskey caramel?? Is it staring me right in the face?? Probably is.

  13. @nikki where is says THIS recipe if you click on the this it takes you to the recipe

  14. I usually don’t comment much, but this post really hit home. My future mother-in-law (we’re getting married in September) and I don’t really get along and she has said/done some pretty hurtful things to me. You made me realize that I am part of the problem, and I need to accept her for the way she is and love her for all the good things she does in order for us to get past MY issues with her.

    Thank you so much for posting this. And to the people who attacked Cesar Milan, please re-read the post and perhaps find somewhere in your life where you are being the problem and work to fix that. Peabody brought up Cesar as an example to support the larger point of her whole post, and you’re focusing on a tree rather than the whole forest.

    These cookies look amazing. I’m thinking they might be a great “peace offering” for my future MIL. :)

  15. Damn these sound like they would hit the dessert craving I’m having right now.

  16. Cooper (3 years old) just saw this picture and yelled “look at those! we need to make those!”

  17. Peabody says:

    @jill- smart boy


  1. […] Chocolate Sandwich Cookies with Bailey’s Irish Cream Buttercream and Whiskey Caramel from Culinary… […]

Speak Your Mind


Log In